this was initially part of the previous post, but decided it was long enough to be on its own. i’ve been noticing more and more that some of my friends are not good at or don’t know how to make friends/connections at work. this is just an initial jumping board of ideas to get the ball rolling.

now, keep in mind, this doesn’t mean you have to schmooze. i really hate schmoozing. and you won’t really make connections with people if its based in schmooze. that’s like trying to build a gingerbread house on a base of melted caramel. (apparently, i’m hungry).

best approaches?:

• team building activities. it could mean playing for the company softball/kickball/bowling team (which could end up being fun). it could mean going on a bar crawl (or charity walk) with a handful of co-workers. these are usually a great way to get to know large groups of people at your office in just one effort. and, usually, no one cares if you really suck at the sport you’re playing.
• striking up a conversation in the break room about the newest twilight movie. i say twilight movie because people generally have strong feelings or know someone else with strong feelings about those movies. hate them, or love them, almost everyone’s connected to them. just like kevin bacon. there are other topics that people are usually connected to (that aren’t politically volatile): harry potter, kanye west, lindsay lohan, how often people twitter, should dogs be allowed in the workplace, how often should you be required to call your mother, carrot top, hugh grant or anne hathaway movies, is sarah jessica parker attractive, ncaa pools…topics to avoid: recycling, abortion, health care, iraq war, racial profiling, company layoffs, god/lack of, infidelity/cheating (tiger woods) or any subject where you get in heated discussions with your current friends/family. if it causes or can cause friction at home, leave it at home.
• asking a co-worker about what they did over the weekend. if they went bowling, and you’ve been looking for a league *BANG* something. if they went feather bowling, and you’ve never heard of it *BANG* something to chat about and learn. however, regardless of how you feel, do not criticize or bum out the story. for instance, if carol the supervisor went snowboarding with her kids, it would probably be best not to talk about how you think it’s to dangerous for kids to participate or that your uncle died in a horrific snowboarding accident. bad taste. this may be common sense to you right now, but it does not always compute in time. trust me. just bite your tongue and find something else to talk about.